Friday, January 19, 2018

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Winter Solstice Soul Star

It's full swing into the holiday season and the last thing on most peoples minds is solitude and quiet. There are cards to write, parties to attend and presents to buy for God's sake! I sit in front of the window, at my large wooden desk filled will projects, and look out at the late afternoon sun as it makes it's way towards the Ortiz and Sadia Mountain peaks. Another December day coming to an end.

The scattered song of wind chimes fill the silence of my room. I watch prayer flags, hung tenderly  at summer's end, carry new and old blessings across the courtyard and surrounding high desert landscape. Muti-colored post it notes decorate the adjacent wall. A bird's nest with three blue eggs sits on one corner of my desk; carefully purchased and placed mid-fall, representing projects and dreams waiting to be birthed. So much left unattended, so much still to do. In my mind at least. No one is putting pressure on me. It is only an idea. An idea that can be dropped at any moment. With this realization comes a long exhale and relief.

Still, in all this ordinary beauty and knowing, I notice my mind seducing me towards the dust covered Prius and town. Errands and purchases waiting to happen. It is tempting. I watch my mind. Amusing and annoying at the same time. Eventually it  passes. I resist the urge to abandon this quiet time alone.  Another long breath. Then another. The tug of town loosens it grip. Put the kettle on. A mug of Barry's Irish tea and fig rolls set the stage for an afternoon at home.

This is the dance of the season. The natural world invites us inwards, while the artificial lights and familiar christmas carol music lure us into shopping malls and post offices. Not that it is bad--just out of balance. Go go go! Busy busy busy! Tis the season after all. Or is t?

Earlier this week I taught a class on Buiding Resiliency and referred to a term researchers often use, a "self-righting" tendency. We are all born with it. A desire for homeostasis. You have a choice. Will you help it or hinder it?

Winter Solstice invites us to help the innate "self-righting" tendency and  relax into the embrace of the darkness. It is the season to chill out! Will you give yourself permission to slow down, recharge and dream a new dream, or reclaim a long forgotten one? Do nothing? Have a cup of cocoa and light a candle? The longest night of the year lures us inwards, invites us to be quiet and honor the richness and mystery of the darkness. The invitation awaits your response.


Time has passed. No street lights in the high desert hills.  I peer out into the darkness, from behind my desk. I imagine the North Star floating somewhere in the black sea of sky above. The North Star can direct the way outwards and onwards. Tonight I am not interested in the North Star. My thoughts wander to my Soul Star. We all have one. Your Soul Star simultaneously shines above you, and dwells  deep within you. She calls you home to yourself and longs for you to shine in your authenticity and sovereignty.

Now is the time to turn your attention inwards. Time to rest in the dark, making space for your Soul Star to emerge and keep you company in your solitude. Time to ponder the question, I often ask in my Creative Discovery workshops, "What brings you fully alive dear one?"

"Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of you aloneness
to learn
anything or anyone that does not bring you alive
is too small for you. "
~ David Whyte (Sweet Darkness)


Sweet Solstice Blessings Dear Miracle (aka You!). May you create time to rest in the darkness, and in the richness and grandeur of your soul. You are worthy of taking some time for your precious self. Please accept Winter Solstice's invitation. I am certainly going to.

It is no time to play small.

With Love,
Pasha
Author of The Joy of Creative Discovery: Practices to Reclaim Your Purpose & Passion
pashahogan.com


Saturday, December 10, 2016

Standing With Our Ancestors

Yesterday was my father's birthday. He would have been 78 years old, if he didn't die six years ago. I miss him. Now he is in the realm of the ancestors. The ones who have come before us, who have paved part of the way so we may go deeper, dream bigger and travel further than they could have possibly imagined. Not only have they come before us, they also walk ahead us and can help lead the way through the darkest of times. We just have to remember to call them in.

"Walking we are listening to a deeper way. Suddenly, all our ancestors surround us. 
Be still they say
Be quiet
Listen
Remember we are the result of the Love of Thousands."
~Linda Hogan  

I understand that Dad is not just my ancestor, he is all of ours - just like yours are mine. There are millions of ancestors rooting for us and cheering us on, longing for us to be quite, to trust and to tune into our own breath and the breath of the Earth.

Recently, I have wondered what my dad would make of the current state of affairs in the country he loved so much. The country that opened Her arms to him when he arrived from Ireland with nothing except a few dollars in his pocket, an address in the Bronx of some friends from County Kilkenny and a head full of dreams. The country where he worked hard, had a family and realized many of his dreams. The country that he loved.




My father once told me, "You can't beat two sides of the same drum." Sometimes life calls us to take a stand, even if it is not popular and uncomfortable. A stand that pulls us out of our comfort zones and leaves us with  unanswered questions. Questions like: What will happen now? How will I /we ever heal, cope, recover, move on etc etc etc. All with the same answer -  I don't know.
Taking a stand outside of our comfort zones usually demands that we get comfortable with not knowing. Not so easy, it is a practice for sure.

The stance that you decide to take can look different on any given day. For some it may look like standing in freezing temperatures for clean water, for others it could look like not picking up a drink, piece of cake or credit card, getting a new job, setting boundaries or entering/ leaving a relationship.
When you take a stand, whatever it looks like, you are not only participating in your own healing, you are taking that stand for everyone. Thank you. You are contributing to healing the world soul. We are all in this together and connected in ways far beyond any knowing.

Moving out of your comfort zone is a radical act of courage and trust - no matter what it looks like.


Not sure how to move in these uncertain times? One action you can take is to stand against the negative self talk, harsh inner critic and self-depreciating voices inside the battleground of your own head that tells you that you are not good enough, or that anything little 'ole you could do would never make a difference anyway. You can make a difference by making the sound of your own breath more interesting than the habitual voices that have stopped you from living with purpose and passion.

Learn to listen, give yourself the gift of stillness first. What is calling you out of your comfort zone? How is the world calling you to show up in your own life? What one action can you take today to honor your soul? Trusting that you are  honoring the world soul when you do so.

You can ask the ancestors for help and guidance. Let yourself be surprised......"remember, we are the result of the love of thousands".

If you have trouble silencing those voices here is an email link to a free guided morning meditation I made to help get you started on your way. It is from my CD The Journey: No Detours and I hope it helps you develop your own meditation practice. It is my gift to you. When you silence your own negative thinking you are doing it for all of us!

With tremendous love and gratitude for you,
Pasha x
www.pashahogan.com




Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Onwards!

"I must go on. I can't go on. I 'll go on."~ Samuel Beckett 

I selected the above quote to precede the introduction when I wrote my book "Third Time Lucky: A Creative Recovery". It most aptly summed up how I felt when I was told I had a recurrence of breast cancer, for the third time, when I was thirty-one years old. That was nineteen years ago. Life is still going on and it has taken many twists and turns, that were unimaginable to me nineteen years ago. I love life.

This morning that quote came to my mind once again. When things don't go the way I want them to, or think they should, it can feel like the end of the world. Indeed, it is the end of the world "according to" my limited thinking of the order of things. One thing I have learned so far, is that endless possibilities exist outside of "according to" thinking.

When the clock went off this morning at 6am I quietly prayed that I would wake up to Hilary Clinton being the next president of The United States of America. She isn't. I cried quietly for a few minutes in disbelief. Then I cried out loud - in belief.

"In difficult and turbulent times stay close to one simple thing in Nature." - Rainer Maria Rilke


I went to the forest. I walked. I prayed. I wondered. What is being asked of me now? How can I serve? How can I show up? What is the next best and kindest action I can take?

Lightning didn't strike. I didn't emerge from the forest with a long list of answers. I did emerge with a lighter step, softer heart and a commitment to be part of the healing. A commitment to do my work, to be kinder, more loving, more forgiving and remember that we are all in this together - no matter who voted for.

Some unsolicited suggestions for turbulent times:

Be gentle with yourself. Take it easy for a few days. Don't watch too much television or get caught up in social media. Put your feet in the dirt. Buy flowers. Do something kind for someone else, no matter how small, and don't tell anyone. Do it because you can - it will make you feel better too. Then, when you are ready ......Onwards! We have lots of bridges to build brothers and sisters.


I hope and pray that nineteen years from now we can look back in amazement at how far we have all come as a global community. I hope you know how much your life and contribution matters in building that bridge. Where there is life, there is hope.

Love Serve Remember ~ Neem Karoli Baba

Sending Tremendous Love to Everyone,
Pasha x




Wednesday, March 30, 2016

To Stress or Not to Stress - You Can Choose

I am in a cab on my way to JFK Airport, my flight to New Delhi leaves in three hours. It's rush hour. The concerned voices of work colleagues advising me to play it safe and get the train linger in the back of my mind.

Choice Number One: Focus on the endless string of red tail lights in front of me, the ticking cab meter, the time on my cell phone.

Choice Number Two: Chill out, enjoy being a passenger and talk to the cab driver.



No matter how I choose to spend my time in the cab, I am going to reach the airport at exactly the same time.

Luckily, I remembered this fact, saved myself a lot of grief, and chose option two. So instead of having a horrible conversation with myself, I had a delightful conversation with Manish.

Manish, my sage like driver, could not understand why so many of his passengers stressed out over time. "If you miss the plane, get the next one. It's not the end of the world." I agreed and felt compelled to confess  how close I came to choosing option one minutes earlier. A humbling reminder of how tender our solid practices can become when we are feeling under pressure. Little did I know I would have another opportunity to put my practice to the test in a few hours.

The flight started off great. I occupied an aisle seat, there was an empty seat in the middle and an interesting young man sat by the window. We chatted briefly and cordially about where we were headed and the purpose of our trips. I told him about working/volunteering with A Fresh Chapter and he shared that he had no plan other than to explore Sri Lanka, India and Nepal for the next six months. We shared the empty middle seat with our books, headphones and blankets. Good boundaries seemed to be in place and I settled in for the long flight.




About two hours into the fourteen hour journey horrendous turbulence kicked in. The kind where it feels like the plane is in the middle of a gigantic cocktail shaker. I held my breath for a few seconds and prayed for it to pass. It didn't. I focused on my mantra, for at least another ten minutes, still there was  no sign of it stopping. Suddenly, the terrifying thought that it could be like this for the next twelve hours sprang into my mind.

That single thought had the potential to wreak havoc. "Oh my God! I'll never make it!" I could feel the panic rising and had an incredibly strong impulse to grab the arm of the young man by the window. Instead, I calmly said out loud " Hey Tim, I am having a really hard time with all this turbulence. How are you doing? " Tim simply said, " It's just rocking you to sleep Pasha. No big deal, it's just rocking you to sleep."

Wow! In that moment my panic turned into acceptance, just like that. My focus changed and I let go. Manish flashed into my mind and I remembered that I was going to arrive in New Delhi at the same time, whether I was freaking out or not.

I put on my headphones and listened to the relaxing playlist I made for a yoga class the day before. The turbulence eventually subsided. The potentially terrorizing journey transformed into a rocking one.



We always have a choice, sometimes we just need to be reminded. Important strangers can often serve as important messengers. Once we shine the light of awareness on any situation we have a better chance of making a choice that serves us as opposed to one that hurts us.

The spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle reminds us that with each breath we have an important voice to make.
Present moment: friend or enemy?

Remember, you get to choose.

Bright Spring Blessings for friendly choices!

With Tremendous Love,
Pasha











Monday, February 29, 2016

Out Of My Comfort Zone

I am out of my comfort zone. I am living in New York City.

Never in my wildest dreams did I see myself living in any city ever again, let alone the one I was born in nearly fifty years and left just before high school. When I tell people I have recently moved here they usually ask, "Where did you live before this?" "Hawaii", I reply. They look at me, eyes wide open with surprise and disbelief and ask, "Why did you leave Hawaii for New York?"

"I followed my heart."


Following my heart hasn't always been the easiest or the most sensible path I have taken in the past. Any of you who have read my book, Third Time Lucky: A Creative Recovery can testify to that! A fact I was well aware of when I swapped my flip flops for snow boots. Are there days when I wonder to myself, "What the hell am I doing here?! Yes. Are there days when I long to hear breaking waves and rustling palm leaves instead of screeching brakes and car horns? Yes. Are there nights when I look out my apartment window searching for stars and am blinded by street lights instead? Yes. Does my heart ever sink? Often. Do I regret my decision? No.

Why not? Because, after all these years of working on myself and engaging in spiritual practices, I have reached the understanding that every time I leave my comfort zone I enter the discovery zone.

The discovery zone invites us all to see the world with new eyes and dream wilder. It offers us an opportunity to break free of the ideas and expectations that limit our sense of who we are and how we think life is "supposed" to go. It encourages us to ask questions, be playful and stay curious. Ultimately, the discovery zone calls us into a deeper intimacy with life.

Remembering this helps me to stay present, even when I am uncomfortable, and ask questions from a fresh perspective:

What is being asked of me now?
How can I serve?

I carried these questions with me on a trip to Sedona, Arizona a couple of weeks ago where I was facilitating a retreat called, Embracing Your True Nature. I am always amazed and humbled by the important strangers who show up. It is never quite clear to me who is teaching whom.


Shortly after I arrived I went on a  solitary hike into the gigantic red rocks that hovered above the retreat sanctuary of Mii amo like guardian angels. My spirit soared with every step. Feelings of sadness also crept up as I recalled how far away I felt from the ancient landscape and limitless blue sky. When I got to the top, tired and sweating, I lay down towards the cliff edge and spent some time meditating and giving myself Reiki. After an hour or so had passed the dreamy sound of flute music drifted in and out of my consciousness. I had no idea where it was coming from. On my way down I met Robert, the flute player. He was gifting each passerby with a heart shaped stone he had carved himself. Robert has gone hiking every day for the past four years, giving away heart rocks and sharing his message of unconditional love with anyone who will listen. I listened.

"We are here to touch and open one heart at a time, wherever we are. It is time to let go of expectations, forgive others, as well as ourselves, and spread a message of love."

By the time I hiked down to the bottom I felt like I was a lot closer to letting go of the illusion that any of us are separate from the grandeur of nature, by the mere detail of geography.

The beauty of every landscape is mirroring back the abundance of love dwelling within my own heart and within the hearts and eyes of every person I meet, irrespective if it is along a winding dirt path or the subway platform of the 6 train. Love is everywhere.

Since I have been back in New York I am discovering aspects of my own nature that only New York can show me. I am grateful for that.

I am also grateful for The Museum of Modern Art, Central Park, the East River, a new and beautiful relationship with my sister, the local twenty-four hour diner that serves the best split green pea soup I have ever tasted, new friends, my peers and the patients at Integrative Medicine at Memorial Sloane Kettering, an opportunity to walk my talk every day and an open invitation to continue discovering new ways of walking and talking and most importantly - new ways of listening and loving.

Oh yes, and last but by no means least, for the man who my heart felt compelled to accompany here. New York, New York has broken my heart open even wider than I could have imagined. So good they named it twice!

When was the last time you ventured out of your comfort zone?
What was your experience?

I would love to hear from you!

P.S. I am off to India this week with Terri Wingham of A Fresh Chapter. We are leading a group of courageous hearts way out of their comfort zones on a volunteering adventure to New Delhi! I am guessing New York will feel comfortable compared to New Delhi....we shall see. More to come.

I have some exciting news to announce when I get back....stay tuned!

Namaste &  Love,
Pasha



Thursday, June 13, 2013

Virtual Book Tour & Book Giveaway!

Every mother wants the best for her baby, right? Well, since the birth of Third Time Lucky: A Creative Recovery a few months ago I have been asking the question, "What does this book need from me to make it's way out into the world?" I am still asking that question.

It is hard to let go of something you have tended to, cared for, lost sleep over and loved fiercely into life for many years. It is scary to release a newborn into the world and hope it will be treated with kindness. Will people like it, hate it, get it? Who knows? Ultimately, that is none of my business. Now my job is to help deliver it to as many people as possible, so they can have their own relationship with it and be inspired to enter their own stories and be healed by them.

As much as I would love to go on a book tour around the world, I knew there was little chance of that happening, at the moment anyway! That is where my dear friend/goddess and "social media for good" wellness advocate, Marie Ennis O'Connor, and winner of Irish Blogger Awards 2012 came in. Marie is amazing and much more au fait in cyber world than I am and she suggested we bring the book on a virtual book tour. She chose five top bloggers from different backgrounds in the U.S.A, Canada and Ireland and asked them to review the book and share their perspectives online. I loved the idea and am thrilled to invite you on this tour from the comfort of your couch. I am deeply grateful to all of these change makers, innovative thinkers and gifted writers for participating in this tour and delivering Third Time Lucky to a wider audience.


The tour takes place this week as follows:

Monday, June 10 - Terri Wingham (Canada) of A Fresh Chapter, check out our first podcast!
 Passionate about big dreams, meaningful travel & overcoming adversity to write fresh chapters.

Tuesday, June 11 - Martine Brennan (Ireland) Irish writer and coach.

Wednesday, June 12 - Beth Gainer (U.S.A) Breast cancer blogger and author.

Thursday, June 13 - Yvonne Watterson (U.S.A via Northern Ireland) Working. Writing. Wondering.

Friday, June 14 - Suzanne Mangia Cummins, Guest Blogger for Journeying Beyond Breast Cancer(U.S.A/ Ireland)   *Enter for a chance to win a free copy today!

Thanks for your support and please let me know if you have any great ideas to help the book on it's way.

You are amazing!

One Big Love,
Pasha x