Wednesday, November 9, 2016


"I must go on. I can't go on. I 'll go on."~ Samuel Beckett 

I selected the above quote to precede the introduction when I wrote my book "Third Time Lucky: A Creative Recovery". It most aptly summed up how I felt when I was told I had a recurrence of breast cancer, for the third time, when I was thirty-one years old. That was nineteen years ago. Life is still going on and it has taken many twists and turns, that were unimaginable to me nineteen years ago. I love life.

This morning that quote came to my mind once again. When things don't go the way I want them to, or think they should, it can feel like the end of the world. Indeed, it is the end of the world "according to" my limited thinking of the order of things. One thing I have learned so far, is that endless possibilities exist outside of "according to" thinking.

When the clock went off this morning at 6am I quietly prayed that I would wake up to Hilary Clinton being the next president of The United States of America. She isn't. I cried quietly for a few minutes in disbelief. Then I cried out loud - in belief.

"In difficult and turbulent times stay close to one simple thing in Nature." - Rainer Maria Rilke

I went to the forest. I walked. I prayed. I wondered. What is being asked of me now? How can I serve? How can I show up? What is the next best and kindest action I can take?

Lightning didn't strike. I didn't emerge from the forest with a long list of answers. I did emerge with a lighter step, softer heart and a commitment to be part of the healing. A commitment to do my work, to be kinder, more loving, more forgiving and remember that we are all in this together - no matter who voted for.

Some unsolicited suggestions for turbulent times:

Be gentle with yourself. Take it easy for a few days. Don't watch too much television or get caught up in social media. Put your feet in the dirt. Buy flowers. Do something kind for someone else, no matter how small, and don't tell anyone. Do it because you can - it will make you feel better too. Then, when you are ready ......Onwards! We have lots of bridges to build brothers and sisters.

I hope and pray that nineteen years from now we can look back in amazement at how far we have all come as a global community. I hope you know how much your life and contribution matters in building that bridge. Where there is life, there is hope.

Love Serve Remember ~ Neem Karoli Baba

Sending Tremendous Love to Everyone,
Pasha x


  1. Beautifully put. Thank you for the gentle reminder to be of service to others and kind to oneself. It's much needed.

    1. Thank you friend - let's keep reminding each other. Bright Blessings to you! xoxo

  2. Your blog sums up my feelings, as well. Shock, disbelief, grief. I even took a walk through the Skokomish old growth forest to hug the trees for comfort. I know that rebuilding myself and my community is next. Still, in all honestly, can struggle with moments of dispondancy. We need to heal ourselves and each other. We will create a vision in unison and manifest it with our energy intertwined with others and the devine. Thank you Pasha, for being a light bearer and facilitator.

  3. A deep bow to you Annette for holding sacred space internally and in your community. Yes, the trees and Nature have much to teach us - lets keep showing up for everyone! Thank you!